Laughing

Ever realized just how good a laugh felt and then had the thought - when's the last time I laughed that hard?! I hope my dad doesn't take offense to this but in some ways I feel I'm becoming more and more like him and there's some good and some bad to it. You see, I love my dad, he's a very loving man who would do anything for his family (I know because I've pushed it and seen it in action). He's a man who loves the Lord and would do anything for a friend - all things that make me proud to be his daughter. BUT, I also find him a little hard to crack at times. He can be very serious and seem aloof although I'm sure that's not how he intends it to be. I sometimes felt (growing up) like he didn't laugh at the funny stuff or seemed to be harder on me than I thought necessary (don't we all think that about our parents). The problem is, that's how I see myself now! I see myself yelling, yes I'll be honest YELLING, at my kids more, getting frustrated with them more easily and not enjoying their silliness but instead wanting them to be more serious. Today was one of those days (as has the last week) where I thought I would pull my hair out with my kids. I had a couple of meetings to go to, a work-out to get done, schooling to do with Ian, a shower, a little bit of business to do, and the last thing I needed was silliness from my kids! (Yes, I hear the unreasonable-ness in my own sentence and am convicted of it.)
Sidebar!!{Unfortunately, Ellie wasn't being silly she was crying it seemed like all day for no apparent reason. After being in the house Monday, Tuesday and most of Wednesday (to go to church) due to car troubles (don't even get me started on that) I thought it'd be nice to finally be out (in our -50 degrees with the wind chill weather) BUT I think I was wrong. It made me more stressed!}
Okay, here's some of the things Ian did today. We're trying to head out to the gym so I had asked him to get dressed. I'm getting Ellie's jacket on, my jacket, my shoes and getting ready to head out the door when I see that yes, he's dressed and what is he wearing? Clothes... but what's on top of his clothes?!!! His clone-trooper Halloween costume! I must admit I'm laughing about it now but I wasn't happy then but I didn't have time to do anything about it. So, we went to the gym, a meeting and met Brian for lunch at the club all in his costume. When I called Brian about meeting for lunch I told him, I haven't had my shower or anything yet are you going to be embarassed? He told me he loved me anyway. I guess I didn't mention Ian's outfit and Ian ended up waiting for him at the door of the place and Brian said to me - I was prepared for you but not for Ian's full costume at the club! Next, we're home and did school and we're getting ready to head out again for another meeting and this time I asked Ian to take off the costume. We get to the gym (for a meeting) and I asked him to carry the baby bag and he asks, can I take in my clone? Well, I thought he meant one of his little figures he has so I said yes. Well, I got Ellie and hurried inside (did I mention the -50 with the windchill?) and I turn around to see Ian carrying his big clone trooper helmet, lightsaber and the baby bag!!! I almost fell I couldn't believe it!!
Brian just told me this story but while at the gym for the meeting (Brian was at the same one) he took Ellie and was going into an open gym area and told Ian to come with him. Well, I had Ian "watching" my friend's two boys at the same time for the same meeting (which in case you think we're horrible parents the meeting was only about 5 minutes long and they were in the Fit'n'Fun area playing) but Brian didn't realize it. So, after a couple of minutes he looks to make sure Ian's coming and he sees the two boys coming too and asks Ian, why are they coming? To which Ian replies, "Dad, I'm watching them!!" What a good boy. He really is.
If anyone's in need of therapy, blogging really is a way to be able to work out some issues!!! In fact, what's kind of funny is I didn't even start to talk about any of this I was simply going to mention that after my crazy day I rushed out the door to go to a movie with a couple of friends. During the movie I laughed so hard and seriously had the thought, "When's the last time I laughed that hard?" Now, after rehashing my day I've laughed a lot and cried a little too. Aren't we, as humans, amazing? I'll tell you something even more amazing - God can have a day like this with us, too, where he wonders what were we thinking and then at the end of the day still be filled with such amazing love for us that it's incredible!! Why? Why would he love us in that way when we are so undeserving of it? He takes such delight in us. Lord, I pray that I would delight in my kids in the same way and that through my love for them, they will see YOUR love shining through.